Initally when Professor Nell told our class that we would be doing a self portrait as our final assignment, I immediately had negative thoughts. The process of self doubt began and I felt like I was not capable of recreating an image myself by using just an eraser and charcoal. I also felt like it would be weird to draw myself by constantly looking at myself in a mirror and having a light shine onto my face. Later, I saw the benefits of the mirror and the light source and was grateful for both of them.
Starting the project was the most intimidating part of the entire project for me. I was trying to process what I actually look like, how people perceive me to look, and trying to translate that all onto paper. Nell told us to start with our nose, and the lightest light on our nose. From there we could explore other parts of our face. My nose was a struggle for me seeing as I had to re-draw it 7 times, but once I finally got my nose down I was able to move onto my lips, face, eyes, and eyebrows. The more time I spent in the art studio, the more comfortable and confident I felt about my skills. I was able to zone out by listening to music and just focusing solely on the self portrait. The art studio was like an escape for me from my worries about other finals.
Overall, I really enjoyed this project and it turned out to be my favorite one of the semester. I learned so much about myself and my face. I learned that I enjoy asking questions, getting feedback, interpreting that feedback, and using it to improve. I also saw that I am very persistent and unwilling to give up on something until it is completed. By staring in the mirror for over 20 hours, I was able to see all of my imperfections that make me perfectly imperfect. I never noticed the darkness around my eyes, the large creases under my eyes, and my undefined cupids bow on my lips. I would like to continue doing self portraits in the future and hopefully they will improve overtime.